


Gotham's Finest

by lameassthiam



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Everyone Is Gay, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, New York, Non-werewolves, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Roommates, and dense as hell, attempt at slow burn, cliches, lowkey drugs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-31
Updated: 2018-02-24
Packaged: 2019-02-24 10:49:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13212201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lameassthiam/pseuds/lameassthiam
Summary: AU where Liam goes to off to college at NYU and is roommates with Theo, Mason, and Corey. When Mason and Corey get together, Theo and Liam band together and try to make the most out of their college years. This is meant to be just a journey in which thiam are dense as hell and have adventures and participate in cliches because im a literal trashbin.This is sort of related to "Faculty Christmas Party" but also just not related at all.





	1. Welcome To New York

**Author's Note:**

> hi! welcome! please enjoy! this is short and just like "getting your feet wet." the next chapter will be longer, i promise!!

**_AUGUST 28 2012_ **

The elevator bell dinged and Liam cherished the last few seconds of silence before the doors spread open and his ears were quickly hit by the rush of noise. The scene in front of him was one of utter chaos. Students ran down the corridor, parents stood with wide eyes, and boxes littered the ground. Liam picked up his duffel bag and backpack, slinging them over opposite shoulders. He fished a piece of paper out of the side pocket of his duffel and quickly read over the information printed out.

**Liam Dunbar:**

**Brittany Hall, suite #333.**

**Suitemates: Theodore Raeken, Mason Hewitt, Corey Bryant.**

**Roommate: Mason Hewitt.**

**Luggage:  In transit from California- pick up 8/29/12 location TBD**

He had his dorm key already on his keyring which he retrieved from the other pocket of his duffel bag as he made his way down the hallway. He stepped over all of the discarded cardboard and miscellaneous trash and suddenly had a panging in his heart for his parents.

Usually, move-in day for your first year of college is a full-on family event. Some of his friends had texted him horror stories of their dad’s employing the entire soccer team to move their shit. Mothers are supposed to cry and give warnings to not get too crazy, siblings are meant to be bored. Liam had none of that. Liam’s step-dad was a surgeon and had a once in a lifetime surgery that exact day. He’d pleaded with his mother, trying to get her to fly out from California to New York with him but she refused. The last time she’d been on a plane was flying to New York with Liam for Liam’s biological father’s funeral. Liam was too young to remember, and his parents had been split for a few years with his mom already planning to get remarried. She hadn’t been on a plane since, citing her reason as being every flight felt like a trip to his grave. And Liam didn’t have any siblings, so he Liam was alone on move-in day with only a duffel bag and backpack. There were annoying, fretting parents everywhere though which offered some semblance of normalcy to the eighteen-year-old boy. He passed room 329 and knew his room was coming up soon. He looked from the wall to directly ahead of him, making dead-on eye contact with a pair of gorgeous hazel green eyes. The boy to which they belonged to was leaning against the doorway of a suite two doors down, in only basketball shorts. His torso was defined and covered in a thin sheen of sweat, proving the theory that New York City summers are _brutal._ His hair was mostly covered by a navy blue backward snapback and a toothbrush was hanging out of the corner of his mouth. Liam was tempted to laugh until he realized that two doors down was number 333. And he was living in 333. Liam bit his lip to contain his laughter, his face resting with a pained smile, and walked the remaining few feet to dorm 333.

“Hey! You must be, Liam!” The toothbrush guy said after he removed said toothbrush from his mouth. Liam noted the drastic change in tone of voice from California to New York, and especially in this guy’s voice. He was clearly a New York native, the other tell being the small Rangers logo on the bottom of his shorts and when he turned around, you could see the Yankees logo on his snapback. Up close, Liam noted his lightly tanned skin, undoubtedly a guy who spent many days down at Jones beach. His hair was a light brown color, accented with natural blond highlights from sun exposure.  For now, though, Liam was faced with this guy’s glistening six-pack and he couldn’t be more _done_.

“Yep, I’m Liam.” He responded in an admittedly clipped tone. He stuck his hand out for the guy to shake and awkwardly waited as one of his presumed roomies stuck the toothbrush back into his mouth and shook his hand.

“ _I’m Teo_ ,” he said with a mouth of toothbrush. _So this is Theo?_ Liam thought, thinking the emails they’d exchanged didn’t match this guy’s persona at _all._ When all four boys had been assigned as roommates, they’d had a few emails over who would get the microwave, fridge, or the couch for the cramped living space they were blessed with. Theo had always responded quickly, usually saying that he already had whatever item it was they were discussing. While Liam, Mason, and Corey were all freshman, Theo was a junior. Liam was confused as to why a junior was apparently bunking up with freshies _voluntarily_ except Theo was super helpful in his emails and seemed really nice. He had _seemed_ like a guy who wore glasses and read comic books in a dingy basement, to be honest. The guy in front of him right now who was delivering a flirty wink to a hot freshman walking past them was _not_ who Liam had pictured.

“Are you going to just stand there or are you comin’ in?” Theo was asking (toothbrush removed) already stepping into the dorm room. Liam left the door open behind him as he followed Theo into the suite. There wasn’t a parent in sight, only two other boys sitting on the devastatingly comfortable looking couch which took up the majority of the common space. Off one wall was the door to the bathroom and a bedroom, and the other wall housed another bedroom off of it. Theo disappeared into the bathroom, returning a moment later with a wide, clean toothed smile.

“Cleary Liam isn’t too big on words, but we can fix that,” Theo wisecracked from beside him, throwing a sweaty arm around Liam’s shoulders.

“I’m Liam,” he said, finding his voice amidst the pressure of Theo’s sweaty body against his. _God, I hope this kid doesn’t make a habit of being sweaty and shirtless._

“I’m Mason,” One of the guys said, adjusting the collar of his short sleeved button up floral printed shirt. Something told Liam that despite his rich, prim and proper looks, that kid could go _hard_ at a party.

“And I’m Corey,” The other guy said with a shy smile. Liam nodded and smiled back in response, somehow shoving Theo’s arm off his shoulder without it seeming weird.

“So, you’re with me. I didn’t really bring much, I’m coming from California so I don’t have a lot of stuff,” Mason said, getting up from the couch and leading Liam into the room next to the bathroom. Liam laughed at how similar his own impending words were going to be.

“I live in California too. I really only brought this duffel and then I have a few boxes coming tomorrow. Where in California are you from?” Liam asked, dropping his duffel bag which was filled with one sheet and some clothes onto the empty bed on the left side.

“Down by L.A,” Mason said. “You?”

“Like an hour northeast of San Francisco,” Liam said, glad to know he wasn’t the only one from far, far away. Corey seemed like an Atlanta boy, or maybe Boston, somewhere with manners. And clearly, Theo was in his home state.  

“Cool! Kind of weird to be on this side of the country, right?” And with that, Mason and Liam were off. They talked all things California, and all things _everything_ as they unpacked what little they had and cross-referenced which posters they were each bringing. An hour later, they were both lying on their backs on their respective beds, responding to questions the other one asked before ultimately passing out.

 

* * *

 

Later that day, around six p.m., there was a loud knocking on the door before Theo threw it open. Liam lifted his head at the sound of Theo’s voice, declaring he and Corey had just returned with take-out.

“It’s an extreme delicacy, a food neither of you Californians have ever tried. Although, I must say it’s become real overrated lately. It’s still mad good,” Theo said, waving for them to get out of bed and congregate in the living room. Mason and Liam looked at each other and shrugged in confusion, getting up and following Theo out of their room. In the common room, a table made of turned over cardboard boxes was set up and covered in takeout bags dotted with a green logo reading “shake shack.”

“The hell is 'shake shack'?” Liam asked, sitting down on the couch in the empty spot next to Theo. It took him a minute but as Theo explained what shake shack was (a burger & milkshake chain), Liam noticed how _less_ frat-boy Theo looked. The first shocker was the black, wide frame glasses. The second being the replacement of the snapback in favor of his hair being free and messy. And the last was the black t-shirt with the Stark Industries logo on it. He looked every bit the nerd that he had sounded like in his emails.

“I need a full reaction, every single thought,” Theo commanded as Liam picked up the burger he was offered uneasily. According to Theo, shake shack was the shit but Liam was quite partial to In N Out. Mason and Corey were engaged in their own conversation while they sipped milkshakes on the floor. From what he could hear, they were talking about Boston (Liam was right!) and Mason was lowkey putting the moves on Corey.

“I don’t understand why this is such a huge deal, I mean, it’s just a burger dude,” Liam said with a casual eye roll before he bit into the burger. He decided right then to forever entrust Theo with making all food-related decisions in his life. Liam must’ve made some type of near orgasmic expression and noise because Theo started laughing hard.

“ _It’s just a burger, dude,_ ” Theo mocked him, speaking in a stereotypical surfer voice.

“What the fuck is in this and why is it magical?” Liam asked through a mouth full of food. Theo went off on a tangent, explaining all the nuances of a shack burger and why they were just _that_ great. Liam had to keep from choking on his own food, he was laughing so hard. Theo was _really_ into shake shack and the way he talked about it was so amusing that it completely reset any preconceptions Liam had about him. The twenty-year-old in front of him was clearly not the frat boy he had seemed like, and maybe he wasn’t as nerdy as his writing made him. Something about the two sides of Theo that Liam had seen today gave him a good feeling inside. Maybe New York wouldn’t be that different, maybe being without his parents wouldn’t be weird, and hopefully, he’d be able to make good friends out of the three boys he was living with.

After the group of four finished eating, Theo brought out his laptop and Corey found a Men In Black DVD somewhere in their room. They all spread out across the couch and the floor, the laptop acting as a TV on the cardboard table. Mason sat with his back on the couch, Corey had his legs across Mason’s lap. Theo and Liam sat side-by-side on the couch with Liam later on ending up with his head in Theo’s lap. They watched movie after movie until it was two a.m. and nobody was awake. Thus begins the long list of “times Liam fell asleep on Theo.”


	2. Dark Side Of Your Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Theo takes up day-drinking, Liam needs to get laid.

#  **_OCTOBER 1 2012_ **

Liam was comfortable as fuck, that's for sure. He was still asleep, but he was warm and his dreams were soft like a worn-in sweatshirt. Liam was dreaming of a world where he was surrounded by fluffy white blankets, the smell of coffee roasting which was coincidentally exactly what Theo smelt like, and unlimited chocolate chip cookies. He felt safe, at peace,  _ happy _ . That type of sheer happiness was something Liam only felt only a select number of weekday mornings. With his eyes still closed, the eighteen-year-old woke up in the now familiar position. His torso was caught between Theo’s arm and chest with his head resting in the crook of Theo’s neck. Liam’s own arm was tossed lazily across Theo’s shoulder, lightly holding on to the bare skin where his shirt sleeve had ridden up.

“I’m ‘bout to have some  _ major _ beef with you, Dunbar,” Theo said in place of good morning. Liam groaned loudly and refused to open his eyes, already knowing what went wrong. 

“I don’t control it, I’m sorry,” he mumbled into Theo’s neck. 

“It’s just mad annoying,” Theo complained but he didn’t move. In fact, it almost felt like he was hugging Liam closer to him. “Like, I’ve known you for a month and five out of seven mornings, I wake up with your freaking drool seeping through my shirt.”

“If I could stop it, I would. But I don’t control what I do when I’m sleeping.” Liam rolled his eyes and broke out of Theo’s arms, much to Theo’s dismay. 

“I doubt it, dickhead. Remember, you’re supposed to meet your advisor at 12!” Theo called out as Liam trudged out of his room with a grunt. 

“Remember,” Liam called back in a mocking tone. “You’re not my mom!”

In the one month Liam had been away at school, he had woken up in various positions on Theo’s bed, or the couch with Theo, nearly every day. Not two weeks into the semester and Corey and Mason had already gotten together. Admittedly, they were one of the cutest couples Liam had ever seen, but when they’d chosen Mason’s bed as their designated sex bed, Liam had taken to sleeping on the couch. One night when Theo had gotten home late to find Liam sat up on his phone, Theo had busted out his extensive DVD collection and they’d passed out just like they had the first night. At first, they didn’t talk, like at all. They’d get home from a party or a nighttime class, wait for the other one to arrive, watch movies, then fall asleep. Liam's excessive drooling had become an issue, thus ensuring the first time they actually  _ talked _ like normal friends.  

Liam learned quickly that Theo was a complainer, and he hated a lot of things. Liam constantly staining his shirts or pant legs with his drool was one of the many things the twenty-year-old hated. On the flip side, Theo was a really funny guy, but he had a special type of humor. He was a double major in secondary biology teacher education and neuroscience with a minor in neuropsychology/psychology. Which basically boiled down to the fact that he was a genius, but it also meant that 50% of his jokes were science related. For example, when Liam had texted Theo, telling him he’d be home in five minutes because he was picking up Ben & Jerry’s, Theo had responded to the text with oxygen-potassium. Liam, a secondary education major with a focus on history, was beyond confused. It had taken him longer than he’d be willing to admit before he realized he should probably look at the periodic table and sure enough, oxygen and potassium spelled OK.  Other than the cringey dad jokes, Theo was sort of closed off, unlike Liam who could talk a mile a minute. But instead of silently sitting through movies now, the two of them talked about their classes or Theo’s student teaching. Sometimes they’d talk about high school and from what he’d gathered, Theo really didn’t enjoy his time. It wasn’t a huge shock to Liam but it was a tad startling. Theo may be exceedingly nerdy (although he’d gotten better at hiding it) but he was crazy charming. Like one time the four of them went out to brunch on Sunday (even though Theo claimed it was “dumb overrated”) ((whatever “dumb” meant)) and they were short ten on the bill, Theo persuaded to waitress to let it slide just by chatting her up and smiling a lot. 

Mason and Corey were with each other almost all of the time, leaving Theo and Liam to try to find shit to do together. At first, Liam had wanted to do all the touristy New Yorker things like riding a double-decker, seeing the Statue of Liberty, or going to the top of the Empire State Building. Theo had quickly dismissed that thought and had forced Liam to learn how to read a subway map and actually apply it to life without Theo’s help which resulted in them getting stranded in Brooklyn when they were just trying to go uptown. Theo’s “Gotham’s Finest Tour” also included a trip to their closest bodega, a game of  _ Spot the Tourist _ , and a test on if Liam could navigate them from their dorm to Union Square and back. Spoiler alert: Liam could not until the sixth try. They were quickly becoming close friends, although they bickered constantly. Even after having an exhausting Friday of meeting with his academic advisor, and then having American Literature Throughout History for what felt like two thousand years, Liam got home and was still amped with energy. 

Liam barely made it through the door without falling over from being overtired. He was about to dive bomb for the couch but found that Theo had passed out on it, taking up the entire length of the couch. Mason and Corey were sitting on the floor, engaged in a card game.

“Is he alive?” Liam asked, kicking off his shoes and dropping his backpack next to the door to his room. The common room wasn’t messy for a change, all of the normal crap of soda cans and miscellaneous wrappers had been done away with. 

“I’m alive,” Theo responded in a raspy voice, challenging the belief that he’d been asleep. Liam wanted to disagree though, Theo looked the farthest thing from being alive. He was in plaid pajama pants and a t-shirt, the same thing he’d slept in last night. 

“Hardly,” Mason said with a laugh. “When I got home, he barely had a pulse.” Liam raised his eyebrows in confusion, leaving his post at the door and walking to the couch. 

“What do you mean?” Liam asked, forcibly moving Theo’s head and sitting down on the couch. Theo groaned in protest but settled his head back into Liam’s lap. Liam tried not to show any visible shock but on the inside, he was screaming  _ what the fuck _ repeatedly. 

“Theo has taken up day drinking as his new hobby,” Corey remarked. Liam was confused for a moment before he finally noticed the bottle of wine on the floor next to the couch and the dark red droplets that had stained Theo’s white t-shirt. Right off the bat, Liam’s thoughts were ones of concern. Theo had seemed fine in the morning, he was perfectly alright last night, so what had happened during the hours Liam wasn’t home? 

“This is why we can’t have nice things, Theodore,” Liam muttered, administering a harsh flick to Theo’s cheek. The twenty-year-old whined and instead of moving away from Liam, he leaned closer to Liam’s stomach.  _ He’s such a fucking baby, _ Liam thought, reluctantly wrapping draping his arm around Theo’s stomach. 

“We can’t leave him alone, clearly,” Mason noted, taking in the adorable sight that was Theo and Liam cuddling while he wondered how normal this was for the pair. 

“Um, who said I was alone? I have a hand and a laptop,” Theo retorted, his words just shy of being slurred. Corey and Mason cracked up at Theo’s response but Liam scrunched his nose up in disgust, suddenly feeling the need to  _ never _ go near Theo’s laptop… or hands again. 

“Great to know, Theo. I now need to take a bath in holy water,” Liam said.

“Oh, come on,” Theo snorted, the rasp of his voice even more prominent in his scoff. “We share a room, I think you’d know by now if you were sleeping in a semen contaminated place.” Liam bit his tongue to hold back on mentioning that they often shared a  _ bed _ too. But they didn't talk about it. They never consciously made a plan and said: “okay, your bed tonight?” They just fell asleep and let it be, never bringing up the act of sleeping in a tangled mess of their limbs. In fact, right now might have been the first time they’d ever purposefully cuddled.

“You just made this one hundred times worse,” Liam groaned. 

“When was the last time you got laid?” Theo asked as if asking what Liam wanted for dinner. Liam nearly choked on air, glancing down at Theo’s face with an incredulous look. Theo gave him a shit-eating grin. 

“We are  _ not _ having this conversation.”

“Oh, baby wolf, I think we are,” Theo said, underlying seduction in his tone. Liam shook his head and seriously considered running to the nearest bodega and buying bleach.

“What the  _ fuck _ did you just call me? And no- I don’t need to get laid.” 

“Baby wolf? I think it’s adorable considering how obsessed with Wolverine you are. And Liam, I simply mentioned jerking off and your little friend stirred downstairs,” Theo threw him a wink. Mortified and abruptly in touch with his body parts, Liam felt the uncomfortable hardness of his dick.  He thought about dead kittens and the elderly naked before flicking Theo’s cheek again. 

“I think we should focus on the main concern here,” Mason said, bringing Theo and Liam out of their own bubble and into the present. “Theo hasn’t explained why he got drunk in the middle of the day.” 

“Because you lot were out of this place and I was bored, alright?” Theo claimed, a certain harshness to his voice. He shut his eyes and rolled over so his face was more or less on Liam’s stomach. A minute later, he was asleep and snoring lightly. Liam looked down at him with a soft smile, taking in how messy Theo’s hair was and how tranquil he looked. Corey coughed loudly, calling Liam’s attention to him. 

“You wanna play?” Corey asked, nodding his head to the cards spread on the floor. 

“We’re playing chance,” Mason added. Liam nodded.   
“Deal me in.” 

* * *

 

They played cards until it was dinner time and Mason and Corey left. It was just Liam and a sleeping Theo in the dorm. Liam had expected to have to awkwardly gravitate away from Theo, but to his surprise, the older boy woke up just as Liam was plotting his escape.

“What time is it?” Theo murmured groggily. His eyes fluttered open after he spoke and their usual alive hazel-green color had lost their spark, replaced by a bloodshot look.  

“Around seven,” Liam replied in a soft tone. Theo exhaled loudly, dragging himself up to a sitting position next to Liam on the couch. 

“The day?”

“Still Friday,” Liam said, finally able to stretch his legs now that Theo was off him. 

“Fuck my life,” Theo groaned. 

After a few minutes of solid silence, Liam asked,  “What happened, Theo?” 

“Nothing, ” He said, voice just above a whisper, “It’s immaterial.” Theo shook his head at Liam and got up from the couch, dragging his feet toward their bedroom. Liam didn’t go after him right away, something about how dismissive Theo was of the question made him averse to pressing him. Regardless, Liam went against his better judgment and followed Theo into the room five minutes later. His roommate and at this point, closest friend, was sitting up on his bed, chewing on his bottom lip and staring blankly at the wall. Liam walked into the room and sat down next to Theo, not looking at him or saying anything to him. In their month of friendship, Liam had never seen Theo act like this. He always acted with ease and if not with ease, with anger. Void, blank, and unemotional were three words that Liam never thought would come to mind when describing Theo. It took sitting next to him for Liam to realize Theo’s shoulders were shaking and a few tears were rolling down his cheeks. Liam didn’t know what the fuck he was supposed to do; did he comfort him or leave him be?  
“It’s about my sister,” Theo said, his voice sounding hollow and detached. “That’s all I’m gonna say. That’s all _I can_ say.” Liam couldn’t help but turn his head toward Theo with a confused expression. _That’s all he could say?_ Liam questioned. He tried not to let his brain spiral into mass hysteria, praying that he was sitting next to a guy with a dead, or worse, sister.

“She’s not-” Theo finally looked away from the wall and made eye contact with Liam.

“Dead?” Theo asked with a dark chuckle that given the context, was slightly uncalled for. “No, no she’s not dead. We can talk about it another time, I promise. Hold me to it?” Liam nodded, offering Theo the same easy smile that he always did. Theo didn’t smile back, only bit his lip and nodded. They sat in the comfortable silence of their room, staring at the wall, and every once in a while at each other. It wasn’t tense, more like unnatural yet predictable. Liam opened his mouth a few times, wanting to speak but not having the right words to say. When was  _ “another time _ ”? Why did Theo have to be so fucking ambiguous? What was the getting laid comment from earlier? And most importantly- 

“Dude, why haven’t I had sex in a month?” Liam asked at the same time 

Theo said, “Bro, I gotta tell you about this guy I was supposed to go out with tonight!” They both had a good laugh over their tones which matched one of teenaged girls gossiping at a sleepover before the laughter died down and Liam did a mental double take. 

“Wait, what?” He asked, eyebrows skyrocketing into his hairline. 

“The guy I was gonna go out with tonight… before I…” Liam nodded, having gotten that part but he had to say he was sort of shocked at the first section.  _ Guy?  _ Theo was hot, there was absolutely nobody who could deny that. Girls were all over him wherever they went, even if it was just walking down the hallway. Guys were on top of him too, but it was less frequent and Liam didn’t notice it as much. Now that he thought about it when boys flirted with Theo, he never hesitated to flirt back. 

“Oh, I never told you?” Theo was asking Liam now, a surprising upturn in his tone. The twenty-year-old sighed and changed positions so he was sitting facing Liam with his legs crisscrossed. 

“Nope, no that one never was mentioned.” Liam shifted as well, facing Theo and sitting the same exact way. Theo shrugged like it was no big deal (because it really  _ was _ no big deal.) 

“Girls are in the mix too, just to keep you in the loop because apparently, I miss crucial details.” Theo rolled his eyes more at himself than anyone else.  

“What about you?” He wondered aloud after a beat or two of silence.   
“ _What_ about me?” Liam tossed the question back at Theo like a hot potato. 

“Are you straight or like?” Theo reworded, although not greatly. Liam was about to nod his head and say yes, and if asked one month ago, there would have been no hesitation. Except since he’d been in college, lots of things were different, including him. Sure, it had only been a month but it was easily one of the most fun months of his entire life. He left everything back in California, in Beacon Hills. Now was his time to question what he grew up knowing and see if there was more to change about him besides his hairstyle or clothes. 

“I’ve never- never done anything with a guy. I don’t really know, but I’m… I’m open.” 

“College is the  _ perfect _ place to be open,” Theo smiled and wriggled his eyebrows. “Regardless of gender, you need to get laid. ASAP.”

“I do not!” Liam protested, leaning forward and swatting Theo’s bicep. Theo yelped and tried to duck away while simultaneously hitting Liam back. Liam pouted as he went back in for another attack, practically falling on top of Theo on the small space provided by the extra-long twin bed. 

“Just let me help you, baby wolf!” Theo delivered another shove to Liam, but the younger boy retaliated and managed to punch Theo’s side. He was all too aware that they were wrestling in bed and that this was basically the plot of a bad porno, but he also found he didn’t care. 

“I can have sex without your help!” Liam shouted back, ducking a punch from Theo that came flying toward his face. Liam laughed when Theo’s hand swung at empty air but was quickly silenced by a kick to the gut. 

“And you have yet to do so because…?”

“Because I’m scared, you dick! College is scary, New York is scary, being alone is scary!” Liam admitted, ceasing his attacks on Theo and just collapsing, his back pressed against the older boy’s chest. Liam was  _ literally _ lying on top of Theo and found that it wasn’t weird, it wasn’t anything foreign.  _ A twin bed is small, you have to make do or do without, _ Liam thought. 

“But you’re doing it, babe,” Theo said, forgetting about the last time he’d outrightly called Liam  _ babe _ , Liam had kneed him in the groin. “You’re doing it.”

“College stuff like studying for tests and going to parties and eating ramen? I’ve done all that  _ with  _ you. New York and all of its profoundly terrifying nuances? You taught me them, I learned from you. I haven’t been alone because the only time I’m alone is in the shower, and even then, you have a terrible habit of brushing your teeth or peeing when I’m in there! I’ve done anything that was supposed to be scary with you, even though getting on the subway still terrifies me! So, okay, having sex for the first time in a bed that isn’t  _ actually _ mine? A little scary.” Liam had let his eyes fall closed sometime during his rant, making random gestures with his hands in the air, knowing full well how idiotic he was being.

“I’m not fucking you if that’s what you’re asking,” Theo informed him. 

“Screw you, I’m trying to be  _ honest _ here.”

“Yeah, okay, dumb honest.” 

“What in the actual fuck does dumb mean?” 

“Ah, for me to know and you to never find out,” Theo’s smirk was evident in his tone of voice and it made Liam want to punch him. He probably wanted to punch Theo way more times than what was healthy for friends, or roommates. 

“Can you believe it’s Friday night and this is what we’re doing?” Liam asked rhetorically. 

“Are you unhappy with it?” Theo responded, sounding genuinely interested. Liam frowned, turned himself around so he was laying on his stomach, looking at Theo from the small space free on the bed. Liam stared at Theo, a million questions swirling in his brain. Staring was easier, it didn’t require thinking too much or emotion. Theo cleared his throat and raised his eyebrows, clearly not wanting to repeat his question. Liam shook his head.

“No, no I’m not unhappy. I'm never unhappy with you.”


	3. This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> thanksgiving has rolled around, Mason knows whats up, Theo tells Liam what happened with Tara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it took me legit two weeks to write this between school and i was in London all of last week sorry :( i hope this is good enough to make up for it?

 

**_NOVEMBER 25 2012_ **

“Okay, let me get this straight,” Mason said to Liam with a shake of his head. “You’re spending Thanksgiving with _Theo’s_ family, and not your own?”

“I don’t see why it’s such a big deal,” Liam groaned. The two of them were sitting in a coffee shop off Union Square West, spending quality friend time before they split ways for the small break. It was a few minutes past ten a.m. but the shop was bustling with action. Liam glanced out the floor to ceiling window that was next to their table and smiled at the sight of snow falling delicately on the street. Union Square park looked every bit the perfect winter wonderland, even though they still had a few weeks to go until it was officially winter. For now, the focus was on late November and the promise of Thanksgiving.

“Thanksgiving is when you go home, see your family, wish you weren’t at the kid's table even though you’re a legal adult!” Mason waved his arms around as he spoke, the coffee cup in his hand tipping and dripping coffee onto the floor and all over his hand. Liam laughed at him and passed him a napkin from the dispenser on the table.

“Booking a last minute flight was too much money,” Liam shrugged. In retrospect, he should have made a comprehensive plan and booked the flight a month in advance, not wallowing around a week before about how they were all too much money. Thankfully, Theo had stepped in and offered Liam a seat at the Raeken family table, saying that Thanksgiving with his family is worse than “sitting in traffic on the L.I.E. in the middle of July.” Sometimes, Liam had zero clues what Theo meant when he was talking. He had gathered though that the L.I.E. stood for the Long Island Expressway, that was after a google search.

“Do you even know _anything_ about Theo’s family? Like, who’s gonna be there?” Mason asked, expressing his overbearing and concerned personality and tone. Liam shrugged and brought his coffee cup to his lips, taking a much-needed sip.

“I met his dad once, he was pretty nice. He seems close with his mom, I swear she calls him three times a day. And Tara, his sister, will be there, but I think their relationship is fucked up. Oh, and he mentioned his aunt and uncle and their two kids would be there too.”

“Dude, that’s just the guest list,” Mason scoffed. “What are the Raeken’s _actually_ like? C’mon, their last name is Raeken, it sounds _and_ looks equal parts terrifying.”

“Well, they own a restaurant in the East Village, so I don’t think they can really be evil,” Liam chuckled and looked down at the table. He was trying his hardest to not overthink what Corey had called “Thanksgiving with the in-laws.” He was super grateful for the invite as it meant his family didn’t have to buy a crazy expensive ticket, and he didn’t have to deal with his grandma asking him when he was gonna get engaged. Besides, he spent pretty much every day with Theo so it would be interesting to see what his family was like. Theo wasn’t the easiest person to get answers out of if it was family or high school related questions. He could talk for hours about life and death, the Big Bang Theory(the show, or the scientific term), or even just how he didn’t _really_ like last week’s episode of New Girl. The second Liam even went to ask him “hey, in high school-” he would immediately get shut down by Theo either giving him his best stink eye or straight-up leaving the room.

“Where do his parents even live? God, we know nothing about Theo,” Mason groaned, although there wasn’t any real misfortune in the situation.

“His veins are practically coffee, he loves Taylor Swift, and in the winter, he sleeps exclusively on his back,” Liam mumbled but Mason still heard him. “Oh, and the Raeken’s live in Westchester County.”

“Theo Raeken,” Mason started, speaking his name slowly. “Loves _Taylor Swift_? Jacked as hell, brooding frat boy, could probably kill you, fucking genius Theodore Raeken loves country sweetheart Taylor Swift?”

“Yeah, it’s actually kind of adorable,” Liam smiled. “He was in the shower yesterday, right? And I was in the bathroom and he’s singing Speak Now at full volume. It was so funny, but he’s actually a good singer.”  
“Real question here,” Mason said, leaning forward and crossing his arms on the table. “Why were you in the bathroom when he was in the shower?”

“I… I don’t remember?” Liam said, blushing immensely. Mason scoffed and rolled his eyes, shooting Liam a look that said he called bullshit. Liam flushed, even more, thinking back to his time in the bathroom with Theo. After getting over the initial shock of Theo singing Taylor Swift, which actually made a lot of sense given how Theo was, internally, a massive teddy bear, Liam had ended up just chilling in the bathroom. He had originally come in to brush his teeth but he opted to sit on the counter next to the sink and just talk with Theo.

_“You’re sure your mom has zero issues with me coming for Thanksgiving?” Liam had asked, eyes focused on the toothbrush cup in the steamy bathroom. Theo had the red toothbrush, and Liam shook his head at how weirdly nostalgic he was getting over a damn toothbrush. He also couldn’t believe he’d made it to his first break in college, and he couldn’t process the fact that he and Theo had only been friends for two months. It felt like they had known each other for years with the comfortable feeling they got when they were around each other and how they poked fun at each other without worrying about offending the other. They could hang out whenever, tired or happy, mad or sad, and they were pretty much glued at the hip. Though, they’d deny it if anyone ever brought it up._

_“She’s fine with it, says she’s happy there’s another mouth to feed because dad makes too much food,” Theo responded with a laugh, still humming Taylor under his breath once he stopped talking. Liam shook his head in amusement._

_“How long have they lived in that house?” Liam wondered._

_“It was my grandparent's house and it got passed down to my mom. I guess they’ve officially lived in it since, like, the day of my high school graduation. We moved up right after and I spent one summer there before college started. You’d be surprised how those Westchester kids can party.”_

_“You do know that I have no idea what Westchester is, right?” Liam chuckled._

_“Idiot,” Theo snorted, the sound muffled by the water in the shower. “Westchester is a county that’s the first one when you get out of the Bronx. Half lower middle and working-class families, half people who_ think _they’re entitled, and then the one percenters.”_ _Theo explained all this with his usual ease. He was a natural at saying things in such a tone that it always made sense, it was no wonder he was the second-best in his teaching program._

_“Sounds… exciting.”_

_“Yeah, well, it’s got good scenery,” Theo mumbled. Liam’s eyes snapped up from the loose thread on his jeans and to where the shower curtain had sounded like it was pulled open. Theo stepped out of the shower and bit his lip, his hands coming to rest on his hips. He was dripping wet, water droplets clinging to pink and raw skin, the heat of the water draining its normal tan. Liam’s eyes widened and he tried his best to stop his eyes from dropping anywhere past Theo’s belly button. Meanwhile. Theo had moved on to the next topic, but Liam had no idea what he was saying. Liam failed at keeping his eyes up and aside from the fact that Theo was well endowed like he’d expected but better, Liam felt a mix between horny and envious at Theo’s legs. But it was over all too soon when Theo stepped back into the shower, displaying his perfectly rounded ass before he slid the curtain closed again. It had taken Liam a run in the frozen outdoors, a bitingly cold shower, and a reading of the copy of Macbeth Theo had lying around to get rid of his boner and every arousing thought he had._

“Okay, your terrible lying abilities and tomato red face aside, I wish you all the luck with Theo’s family,” Mason said.  
“Why would I need luck?” Liam asked, blinking rapidly and trying to think about anything but how _hot_ Theo had looked. And come to think of it, even though he didn’t want to, Theo kind of _always_ looked hot.

“Uh, because when I met Corey’s parents, they were two steps away from literally asking me for my social security number.”

“Corey’s your boyfriend, Theo’s my friend-friend,” Liam stated defensively.

“Hmm, he’s pretty close,” Mason taunted. “You have cute nicknames for each other, eat dinner together almost every night, and not to mention you _share a bed_!”

“What?!” Liam exclaimed, visibly blushing He thought Corey and Mason didn't know about the sleeping thing.

“Bro, it's not like you guys made any efforts to hide it,” Mason said. “I'm not calling you out or anything but it's a little weird. You do you, though… or on second thought, do him!”

“Have a safe flight, I hate you so much,” Liam muttered, standing up from the table and leaving the coffee shop.

* * *

 

At around 3 pm. Liam found himself at Grand Central terminal, searching for a northbound train on the Hudson line. Precisely one hour later, he was pulling the strap of his duffel bag over his shoulder as he exited the train at a stop in Croton. He pulled out his phone as he ascended the stairs to the top of the train station and texted Theo.

**Liam: Just got off the train**

**Theo: walk toward the highkey sus dry cleaners and hold your horses**

**Liam: You’re so weird.**

Liam did as instructed, finding the one story, dirty brick dry cleaner’s building with ease. He leaned back against it and flicked through his phone, not paying attention to whatever he was doing. First of all, it was one thing to have just been stuck on the train for an hour alone but it was another to now be alone in a half-deserted parking lot with only seagulls for company. On the bright side, it was less windy in “Croton” so Liam didn’t feel like he had a thousand little snow particles flying into his face. He was somewhat happy he was just meeting Theo up here as opposed to being on the train with him and not having any time to silently freak out… alone.

A car horn beeped in front of him and Liam looked up from his phone to find a blue pickup truck idling in front of him. He rolled his eyes with a grin while he opened the back door and tossed his bag in the backseat.

“Hello, Theodore,” he called from the back, closing the door and hopping into the passenger's seat. Theo smiled at him from across the car, sticking his hand out in a fist bump over the center console. Liam bumped him back and displayed the same smile in return.

“So, prior to meeting the Raeken family, I think it’s time I actually tell you about Tara,” Theo declared instead of a simple _hello to you too, Liam._ The younger boy found his hands getting sweaty as he drummed his fingers on his thigh, thinking of all the possible things Theo was going to say about Tara. All he knew was that for one reason or another, Tara and Theo had a major divide between them resulting in a lot of tense feelings on both ends.

“Um, okay, up to you…?” Liam stuttered, eyes flicking over to Theo whilst he pulled out of the parking lot of the train station.

“It happened a while ago, I was around nine and she was thirteen. We went on a family camping trip in the fall, it was a tradition we always had,” Theo’s expression settled in one of blissful nostalgia before the expression dropped and he frowned. “I wanted to go for a walk at night and our parents had gone to sleep so Tara came with me. I ran way ahead of her over a bridge and she tripped and fell into the creek. She broke her leg so she couldn’t get out and I was so far ahead that I barely heard her yelling until I realized she wasn’t behind me. I went back and she was still crying and halfway out of the creek. I was so shocked that apparently all I could do was stand totally still and I just couldn’t move at all. Thankfully, my parents had woken up at this point and were able to get Tara out of the water, with a broken leg and severe hypothermia. She was in the hospital for a really long time and she contracted a pretty serious cardiovascular disease from the hypothermia and spends a lot of time in the hospital now. Her leg didn’t heal correctly either and she got an infection from the water, which has resulted in a lot of pain ever since. So, she blames me for it and that’s why we aren’t close.” Liam was speechless, he thought that it was going to be bad but somehow what Theo told him was something totally different. He wasn’t really sure how to react, or how he was supposed to react. Theo didn’t seem to be in any type of need for comfort, as it had also been around a decade ago, but you never really knew with Theo.

“God, Theo, that’s…”

“Pretty fucked up?” Theo laughed, the same type of dark laugh he had the last time they’d talked about Tara. “I don’t have the slightest clue as to how to act around her now, and it’s been however many years. So, I guess I’m just warning you?” Liam found himself somewhat annoyed at the nonchalant tone of Theo’s voice and the indifferent facade he was putting up. This was a serious thing, as shown by the void and stoic state he got into a few months ago and his immense reluctance to talk about it until now. Liam figured that maybe this was the way Theo had to deal with it, in an air of “it’s in the past.” Maybe it was a matter of time, and in a few months Theo would _truly_ open up and not just scratch the surface like he was doing right now.

“You trust me, right?” Liam asked suddenly, just as Theo’s turned the truck onto a residential street. Liam noticed as Theo visibly tensed and his fingers tightened on the wheel.

“I’ve never told any of my friends what happened before, so thanks for being that person… ” Theo turned briefly from the road and smirked at Liam, “baby wolf.”

“ _Bro,_ ” Liam groaned, tipping his head back against the seat and glaring at Theo. “You totally just killed that moment.”

“ _‘Moment’_ ? _”_ Theo scoffs, making another left turn onto a more cramped street, slowing the car down.

“Yeah, a moment, idiot. A bro moment… a _bro_ ment!” Excitedly, Liam turns in his seat and slaps his hand against the dashboard. Theo whines, the sound comparable to one of a dejected little boy who didn’t get _exactly_ what he wanted for his birthday. He mumbles something else under his breath that Liam is kind of glad he didn’t catch. A minute later, Theo parks in a driveway of a two-story house painted a chipping gray color with a wide front porch. He cuts the engine of the car and turns to look at Liam, an apprehensive look on his face.

“Oh no,” Liam frowns, adapting the same look. “That’s the same face you gave me before that blind date you set me up on and the guy ended up being a major heroin dealer.” Theo rolled his eyes,

“You’re lucky it wasn’t a pot dealer, at least heroin dealers pay for dinner,” Theo retorts, his argument not being helped all that much. “Besides, he wasn’t dealing back in high school so how was I supposed to know?!”

“Um, I don’t know, maybe ask him what he’s been up to?”

“Liam, people don’t just outright state they’re dealing when you ask them what they’ve been doing! God, do you know anything about dealing drugs?” Liam reeled back and cocked his left eyebrow.

“No! No, of course, I don’t know anything about dealing drugs! Why, do you?” Theo averted eye contact, but his smirk seemed to deepen.

“Anyway, I have to tell you something,” Theo said, avoiding the question. “While my mom is totally okay with you being here, I might have told her a _tiny little lie_.”

“ _Theodore Raeken,_ ” Liam said in a warning tone. “What did you tell her?” On the inside, Liam had his suspicions but he _really_ didn’t want to be correct. In one string of rushed out words, Theo said something before he jumped out of the car and started walking up to the front porch. Liam rolled his eyes, getting out of the car and collecting his bag from the back. He jogged after Theo, grabbing hold of the sleeve of Theo’s hoodie at the base of the steps.

“You have to promise to not be mad at me,” Theo said, expression deeply insecure.

“I promise to try to not be mad at you,” Liam smirked, letting go of Theo’s sleeve.

Theo rolled his eyes, “Good enough, I guess. Okay, well, I might’ve accidentally told my mom that there’s a very possibility that you’re my boyfriend?” Liam froze, having been handed exactly what he thought yet having no idea how to react. Theo grimaced and took the three steps up onto the porch then over to the front door. Liam followed after him, dumbly nodding in response to nothing.

“You… you what now?” Fleeting thoughts of holding Theo’s hand, kissing his cheek, leaning his head on Theo’s shoulder raced through Liam’s mind as he looked Theo in the eye. A deep blush had spread across the older boys cheeks but he bowed his head quickly after Liam noticed it. Theo always looked so sure of himself and seeing him so… soft looking was making him even more flustered.

“My mom asked if Liam my friend was code for Liam my boyfriend and I was in the middle of talking to Corey so I said _yes_ to us getting Chinese food for dinner and apparently yes to you being my boyfriend,” Theo explained, his hand inching toward the door handle with every word. Liam sighed and shook his head, ultimately looking at Theo and nodding.

“At least you smell good,” Liam commented as Theo opened the door to his house.

“Aw, _babe_ , how sweet.” Once they were inside the house, Theo immediately leaned down the few inches separating them and pressed a soft, lingering kiss on Liam’s cheek. From next to them, someone cleared their throat and the two broke apart, revealing a woman standing there with her hands on her hips.

“Mom,” Theo cleared his throat, his fingers interlocking with Liam’s. “This is my boyfriend, Liam.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also, sorry if the ending seems rushed? i was on the plane and my brain was about to explode. thank you for reading, commenting, all that good stuff :)


	4. Oh Lord

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liam is a sleuth, Theo has some explaining to do. 
> 
> song: Oh Lord by blackbear

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!! mentions of drugs in this chapter !!!  
>  i'm posting off my phone so sorry if anything is wonky looking!  
> anyway, i hope you enjoy and i promise to get more into the fake dating in the next chapter

“Come to my house for Thanksgiving,  _he said_. It’ll be fun, _he said_ ,” Liam muttered under his breath as he stepped into Theo’s bedroom. It had been an hour since he’d arrived at the Raeken’s and in that hour, he’d managed to come up with several ways he could murder Theo. Additionally, he was starting to sound like Theo which was making him even more angered. It wasn’t that he was totally opposed to having to fake-date Theo over Thanksgiving break, no. He was entirely opposed to fake-dating Theo after the entire event of the Bathroom Incident and how now everytime he looked at Theo, he couldn’t get the image of him naked out of his mind.

So, yeah, he was entirely opposed to this idea. Luckily, Theo was a freaking excellent liar and an even better boyfriend. Fake boyfriend. From the moment they’d been greeted by Theo’s mom, call me “Steph” Stephanie, Liam had been happily nodding along to whatever Theo said about their “relationship” and plotting the aforementioned murder.

Stephanie “Steph” Raeken was one of the nicest people Liam had ever met, and was the classic textbook PTA mom. She had wavy brown hair that was kept in a ponytail, she wore a gray t-shirt with purple lettering that read: New York University Mom and on anybody else, it would have looked horrendous. Within the first minute of meeting Liam, she had offered him five different types of chips, a freshly baked chocolate chip cookie, and had insisted he needed to “get more meat on those bones!” Steph was a stark contrast to his own mother who nurtured in a tough love type of way. Steph seemed borderline smothering and Liam wondered how Theo turned out to be as crass as he was. Aside from that, the Raeken family home was terrifyingly cozy and everything about it seemed to be the opposite of Theo's personality. From the warm light blue walls of their living room, to the distressed white wood furniture, the Raeken’s expressed immaculate design and family-friendly living. Pictures of Theo and (what Liam assumed was Tara decorated the walls of the upstairs hallway, and major family photos sat on end tables. If Liam wasn’t being forced against his will to be in this boyfriend situation with Theo, he would probably be dying over how freaking awesome their house was.

But for now, he had just stepped back into Theo’s room after hiding in the bathroom and trying to “calm himself down.” Also, firing off a **CODE BLUE** text to Mason while he was at it.

“I’m not going to apologize, you know. It’d be pointless,” Theo noted when Liam slammed the door closed to his room and sat with his back against the door. Theo was sitting in a spinning desk chair on the opposite side of the room, his right leg propped up on his left and a smug smirk on his face. Had Liam been the one that planted an excessive amounts of kisses on his opposite cheek and gotten the flushed as fuck reaction as well, he’d be feeling pretty smug too. That wasn’t the case, sadly.

  
“I hate you,” Liam stated and Theo laughed, full and hearty.

“You are a profoundly god-awful liar. We gotta work on that, baby wolf,” Theo winked. Liam rolled his eyes, trying to deflect Theo’s attention from his obvious blush.

“I cannot believe you even got us into this mess,” Liam said with a groan.

“You're right, only you would fabricate a lie this stupid.”

“I’d be mad at you if you hadn't just also insulted yourself.”

“So, backstory time,” Theo said, effectively avoiding the question. “My mom is easy to fool, but Tara won’t believe it unless it's the next step away from a marriage license.”

“Um…. what?”

“God, you are dense,” Theo sighed dramatically. “If we aren't acting dead fucking serious, my sister will never believe it. She may be despise my existence in this world but she'll know if I’m lying, she always knows.”

“Alright, well you're the master coordinator,” Liam admitted as Theo left his desk chair and went to sit in front of Liam on the floor.

“Started dating a month ago, you asked me out, we went to the Highline-”

“Even though it's overrated?” Liam cut Theo off with a smirk, taking the next words out of Theo's mouth.

“Yes, even though it's dumb overrated,” Theo returned the smirk. “Tell me things I need to know about you that only a boyfriend would know,” he demanded.

“Uh, well,” Liam stalled, once again flushing at the thought of Theo as his (fake) boyfriend. “I don't like it when my foods touch?”

“And that means…?” Theo cocked his right eyebrow and subject Liam to his judgemental gaze. The younger boy huffed and scrambled to “redeem” himself.

“Like food groups! If I’ve got peas, steak, and mashed potatoes on my plate, none of them can touch,” Liam said, dropping his head as he blushed.

“Fucking weirdo,” Theo scoffed.

“Whatever, this was your idea,” Liam grumbled. “Tell me something I don't know about you, sweetheart.” Theo rolled his eyes but there was a smile threatening to break out on his adorable face. He seemed deep in thought for a second, tapping his fingers against his chin and catching his bottom lip between his teeth.

“I’m obsessed with chocolate croissants?” Theo offered lamely.

“I already knew that, dumbass.”

“Fine… the more time I spend with someone, the more I take on their mannerisms. Tara always used to tell me I did that, so she’ll notice if I’m acting like you,” Theo admitted albeit dismissively and clearly against his own personal will. Liam nodded just as the doorbell ringing could be heard throughout the house, signaling that either Theo’s aunt and uncle were here or his sister. The older boy stood up and gestured for Liam to move out of the way of the door.

“I’ll come down in a sec, I’m just gonna call my parents real quick,” Liam said to Theo who was already halfway out the door. Theo smiled, his hand wrapped around the frame of the door, awkwardly hanging back into his room. In what seemed to be a split second decision, Theo’s other hand wrapped around Liam’s wrist and tugged his best friend toward him, placing a soft and delicate kiss on his cheek before disappearing. Liam stood with his eyes closed, his whole body on fire and his cheek damp yet burning where Theo’s lips had been. Nobody had been around that they had to pretend for (besides the Raeken family cat who was lurking in the hallway) so why on earth had Theo kissed him like that? Liam dismissed all of the heart fluttering possibilities and settled on the concept that Theo was trying to get Liam used to the romantic gestures so he looked less like a deer in the headlights every time Theo got within a three inch radius of him.

Liam refocused himself, remembering why he had stayed behind in the first place. He didn’t have to call his parents, he’d done that on the train ride up. He had to investigate something and he was under the impression that Theo’s highschool bedroom would be a good start. He pulled his phone out anyway, just to check if Mason had replied to his code blue text . Unsurprisingly, he had.

**Mason: What happened?? Are they serial killers?? Does Theo have an equally evil twin?? Is his evil twin as hot as he is??  
**

**Liam: Theo’s mother is under the impression that we’re dating, not serial killers, no evil twin  
**

**Mason: DATING?? FAKE DATING THEODORE RAEKEN?? HOW?? WHAT??  
**

**Liam: I’ll explain later, call me ASAP**

A second later, Mason’s face and name flashed on Liam’s phone screen with the incoming call.

“I know you said you’d explain later, but dude! You can’t drop a bomb like that and expect me to just roll with it!” Mason exclaimed in replacement of hello.

“I know, I know,” Liam apologized. “I swear I tell you everything later but I need a moral compass slash information.” It was no secret that Mason was crazy smart and an obsessive researcher and for Liam’s task, he needed that support.

“Um, what's up?” Mason asked with uncertainty.

“Remember that date Theo set me up on with the guy that ended up being a heroin dealer?”

“Ah, how could I forget waking up to you and Theo fighting about whether or not the guy was being serious about sharing a needle. Then that was followed up by you shouting, at the top of your lungs, that sharing needles leads to HIV. So, yeah, I do remember,” Mason’s tone was dry but considering it had become almost an inside joke, Liam knew he didn't care that much.

“How many times do I have to apologize before you let it go? And, anyway, I brought it up in the car today and Theo made a comment like _‘do you know anything about dealing drugs_ and obviously I said no. Jokingly or involuntarily, I asked him if he did and he didn’t answer, he just… smirked?” Liam was pacing the hardwood floors of Theo’s room now, his free hand running through his hair in apprehension.

“That Theo smirk, right? The one he gives you if you ask him a question and he knows the answer but he pretends he doesn’t?”

“Exactly that! So, anyway, I'm now in his bedroom and I was wondering where one would put drugs that they deal?”

“Wait, what?! You're on a drug quest in Theo’s bedroom?” Mason was nearly shouting. They needed to work on volume control.

“I just said I was doing exactly that. Mase, just answer the question,” Liam pleads.

“Um… shoe box in the closet, in a pencil case shoved in a desk, inside shoes, back panel of the bookshelf…” Liam checks all those places as Mason rattles them off. Hearing his friends rambling thoughts about how there's no way Theo could be or could have been a drug dealer somehow made the reality of what he was doing diluted. Sure enough, Mason’s first guess was correct as there were three shoe boxes in Theo's closet that held… not shoes. The Nike box had bags and prescription bottles of aspirin sized yellow pills, the Converse box held miniscule baggies of white powdered stuff, and the Adidas box was filled with gram sized bags of what was presumably pot.

“Mason, Mason stop talking,” Liam said, slowly removing the lid of the last box fully. Liam knew Theo had his moments of being kind of sketchy, and how he never wanted to talk about high school, but nothing could have prepared him for this. The pot wasn't surprising at all being that he had come home a few weeks ago to find their bedroom reeking of weed and Theo having an argument with a roll of toilet paper. The pills though? The powder which he prayed wasn't coke? Those were shocking.

“What is it?” Mason asked on the line.

“Nothing,” Liam said, moving to put all the lids back on and re stack the boxes.

“I was just being paranoid, the search was a dead end.

“Oh, alright, dude,” Mason said. “I gotta go but you need to fill me in on this fake dating thing later!”

“I will, don't worry.” Liam ended the call with a nervous chuckle to his friend, sliding his phone back into his pocket with shaky hands.

“Hey, Li? You comin’ down?” Theo’s jarringly cheery voice carried up the stairs, sending Liam into a scramble to close the closet doors and back out of the room.

“Yeah, coming down now!” Liam called back, taking a deep breath out in the hallway. He shut off the lights in Theo's room and walked to the top of the staircase where he could hear Theo carrying a conversation.

“Liam? Yeah, he's an education major as well. Albeit to become a history teacher so I'll let him tell you more about that,” Theo was saying to what was probably his aunt or uncle.

“You're not getting into any trouble lately, are you Theodore?” A woman’s voice asked, sounding vaguely like Steph Raeken.

“No, no,” Theo said with an uncomfortable laugh. “Not getting into any trouble.”

 _Well the cocaine in your bedroom says otherwise_ , Liam thought as he descended the staircase. When he reached the bottom of the staircase and rounded the corner into the living room, Theo caught him by surprise, wrapping an arm around his waist and pulling him into his side. Theo placed a kiss to his cheek, but it lacked the romanticism from the earlier one. Maybe it was because Liam was now wondering how many pills have been in that mouth, or if his nose had ever burned, or if there were more drugs hidden elsewhere. Liam really needed to know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> probably going to do the next 4 chapters in Theo's POV?????


	5. All These Things That I've Done

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it gets weirdly angsty for some reason i don't even know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a HUGE HUGE HUGE thank you to Karina (SweetPoisonedHeart) who is pretty much the only reason this chapter exists and is also just the best person in general

**_Theo's Point Of View_ **

When Liam came down the stairs, Theo knew in an instant that something was wrong. At first, he thought it might have been the repercussions of that kiss on the cheek earlier, which still had left Theo’s head swirling in confusion about _why_ he did that. Then he thought that maybe it was the nerves of seeing Theo’s extended family gathered in the living room. I mean, it _was_ his aunt, uncle, and their two kids. Maybe it was something else because Liam’s voice didn’t waver when he spoke to Theo’s Uncle Matt nor was Theo able to spot Liam’s tell when Matt asked about their “relationship.” For future reference, his tell was the way his tongue swiped over his bottom lip every time he lied.

“So you’ve been dating for a month?” Uncle Matt asked, easily sliding into the conversation. Gathered in the living room were Theo’s aunt and uncle, Theo, and Liam. Steph had lured Theo’s younger cousins, Jane and Ryan, into the kitchen with the promise of trying a cake batter for her. Theo and Liam sat on the loveseat (how fitting) while his aunt and uncle took the opposite couch.

“It’ll be a month tomorrow, right?” Theo asked Liam who was biting his lip exceedingly noticeably, the only showcase of nerves. Now Theo was all distracted, caught up in the way Liam’s teeth indented on his perfect pink lips. Without putting any conscious thought into the idea, Theo grabbed Liam’s hand, interlocking their fingers in the simplest way. A light hold, casual yet romantic and affectionate. Hesitantly, with his brain working again, Theo placed a delicate kiss on Liam’s temple.

“No, it’s a month on _Friday_ , Theo,” Liam said easily, a teasing undertone to his voice, as if unaffected by the kiss. As methodical and organized as he was, Theo had trouble remembering important dates. His family knew this and was always on his case about it and Liam had learned it _real_ quick.

“I’m sorry, you know I’m bad with dates,” Theo laughed, a bashful smile taking his face as he leaned in closer to Liam. Surprisingly, Liam didn’t freeze up totally when Theo’s head was suddenly resting on his shoulder and the older boy was practically in his lap. Theo though, Theo was kinda dying on the inside. Whoever fucking knew that Liam fucking Dunbar smelt so fucking _good_. He smelt like a strange yet fitting menagerie of citrus, spearmint, lavender, and a spring morning if that even had a scent. It was beyond calming, bordering on intoxicating and all-consuming.

“I like you anyway, for some godforsaken reason,” Liam laughed from above him.

“Are you guys doing anything special for your anniversary?” Aunt Phoebe asked them.

“Liam,” Uncle Matt interjects. “Theo tells us you’re studying to be a history teacher. What’s that like? We’re a very science-oriented family.” The conversation passed above Theo who had found himself absorbed in the very idea of Liam. The softness of the blue sweater he wore, which may or may not have been Theo’s, he wasn’t sure. Either way, it smelt completely like Liam now, that _heavenly_ scent. Even Liam’s voice was contributing to the exorbitantly soothed feeling that was washing over Theo. That got him thinking about how well Liam was now carrying this lie. There was something seriously _off_ about him and Theo could really only attribute that to one thing that could have happened when Theo left his bedroom earlier. God, it was like taking care of children, you can’t leave them alone for five minutes otherwise they go looking in places they don’t belong. He supposes that he would have to tell Liam eventually and there really was no time like the present. Besides,  as smart as Liam was, the chances of him figuring this out were slim to none. Or so he thought.

* * *

 

Theo got his confirmation later that night after they’d eaten pizza as a family and watched HGTV.  They were up in his room and Theo had just gotten back from the bathroom. Liam was sitting at the edge of Theo’s bed in a maroon t-shirt and his usual gray joggers. The younger boy’s eyes were practically burning holes into the doors of Theo’s closet. Theo didn’t say anything at first, opting to switch the jeans he was wearing for black sweatpants and discard his t-shirt into his hamper. When the silence became borderline suffocating, Theo sat down next to Liam on the edge of the bed and nudged his shoulder.

“Any questions?” Theo asked him, eyes on Liam’s face. Liam didn’t turn toward him or even acknowledge Theo, he just bit his lip and closed his eyes.

“Okay… seeing as you have lost the ability to talk or respond to human interaction,” Theo trailed off, hoping Liam would take the bait and fight back. He didn’t. “God, you’re making me share way too much,” Theo grunted and pushed off the bed, kneeling in front of the closet, opening the doors, and pulling out the three shoeboxes that were tucked in the back. He placed them in his vacated spot on the bed before moving to where his desk was and grabbing the Harney & Sons tea tin off the top and placing that next to the shoe boxes. Theo went to his dresser next and opened his underwear drawer, grabbing the orange tinted prescription bottles that were placed expertly between socks and boxers; he added them to the pile too.

“I could keep going or you could just ask the fucking question, babyw-”

“Why? Why do you have so many drugs in your room?” Liam cut him off, finally turning to look at Theo. Theo stared back at Liam, his hands on his hips and an exasperated expression on his face.

“I feel spiritually comforted by the presence of MDMA in my bedroom,” he responded.

“The fuck is MDMA?” Liam asked, throwing his hands up in the air.

“Ecstasy, Liam! Know your drugs!” Theo said, his hands dropping from his waist and coming to cross across his bare chest.

“Why should I if I can just ask you, you seem to know a hell of a lot!”

“Ask the question, Dunbar.” Liam sighed, seemingly grappling with how he should word the question. There weren’t many ways he could ask the question and anyway it was phrased,  Theo knew he would have to be honest. He may be a wicked good liar but obviously, the situation he was in was quite compromising.  It used to be a shameless question to answer, in the back of his mind Theo can still hear kids from his high school asking- “you sell, right?” But he hadn’t talked drugs, selling them, since his first year of college.

“Do you… do you deal drugs?” Theo felt the air leave his body as he heard Liam’s ask. He knew exactly what his probably best friend was going to say but actually hearing it made him frazzled. How is he supposed to answer that? Tell him half the truth and walk around every day with even more guilt? That wasn’t happening.  Theo has already been saddled with so much guilt that on some days it was completely unbearable and he could do nothing but lay in bed. Except laying in bed was a recipe for falling asleep and when he fell asleep, he was ambushed with nightmares. Nightmares of his sister, the very source of his guilt, coming after his heart and ripping it out. She claimed, in the dream, that this was exactly what he did to her and that she wanted it back. Regardless of how far it was from the truth, some nights as he ran through the endless loop of getting his heart ripped out, he truly did feel like he stole her heart. The nightmares miraculously stopped at the start of the semester and as much as it scared him, Theo thought it was connected to sleeping in the same bed with Liam. The nights that Liam passed out on his own bed and not on Theo’s, he found himself waking up in a cold sweat, his heart pounding in his chest and tears sticking to his face. That very fear, those nightmares, that was why he didn’t know how to go about responding to Liam. What if he told him everything and Liam no longer wanted to be around him anymore? What if he was so repulsed, so afraid, so _not okay_ with… Theo? **Fuck it.**

“I did, I dealt in high school,” Theo started, hugging his own self tighter, his nails digging into his shoulders as an act of coping. “It started when my parents were always fighting about how they were going to afford Tara’s ongoing medical bills, her college education, _and_ my college education. I tried to convince them that I could just go to community college, or do online schooling, or literally anything. I wanted it all to go to Tara, every single penny because I-I didn’t deserve it.” To Theo’s surprise, Liam’s warm hand pried his own hand off his shoulder. The blue-eyed boy, who was still sitting on the bed in front of him, grabbed both of Theo’s hands in his own and pulled him so he stumbled into a sitting position next to Liam on the bed.

“When did you start dealing?” Liam asked, releasing Theo’s hands once he was seated.

“I-” Theo started, trying to pick his next words wisely. “I started when I was a sophomore and, god, you should have _seen_ the reactions I got. Lowly tenth graders don’t deal, or at least not well. And you didn’t know me back then, I was huge geek-”

“Theo, you are the biggest geek I know _now_ ,” Liam cut in, the light joke relieving the tension that had been building. Theo laughed, but it was strangled and restricted by the choked up way he felt.

“At first, it was harmless. I found a supplier pretty easily, the girl who lived in the apartment below my family’s. She just sold off pot and I just started dealing it, mad casual. I didn’t intend to keep it up for long, just until I had a decent chunk of savings. Eventually, it got to where the people kept coming and the profit was skyrocketing,” he continued on, smiling for himself while remembering the good times. The good times being the new friends he had started to make because of his supplier, the fact he was getting money, and how he was finally seen as someone other than a geek. Realizing where he was in the story, his smile faded, the hardest part was next. Liam seemed to realize the tension Theo had taken on because his hand migrated from lying at his side to resting on top of Theo’s hand. The younger boy rubbed soft circles on the top of Theo’s hand, the sensation calming yet overwhelming all at once.

“Then…  I started trying some myself, only weed. It was the jumping off point, though, because my friends were totally opposed to all that shit. Then everything started to change, my supplier started pushing me to deal more stuff other than pot. It amounted to all this shit I have here,” Theo gestured to the boxed and bottles.

“As I started selling all this other stuff, I started using it. I swear, at first I wasn’t even intending on doing anything more than X that one time. But…  I fell for the sensation, It was an escape. There was no school to stress over, no bills to worry about, no Tara… It was just me and the feeling,” he absentmindedly said. “I kept the gig up for a while, dealing pot, MDMA, and I started selling off my ADHD medication, Ritalin. Shit started to get messy when my supplier started to push cocaine. I didn't want to sell it but I had no choice, I _needed_ the money.”

“So what'd you do?” Liam asked as if there wasn't a box of crushed coke less than a foot away from him. Their hands were still touching, the touches never ceasing.

“I did it, I started to deal it,” Theo avowed, wincing at the slightly disappointed look on Liam’s face. He knew that look and the question that followed it.

“Did you ever-”

“Once, only once and it was _awful_ ,” Theo rushed to say with a bitter laugh. “I never did it again, I promise you that. It didn’t matter, anyway, I was all messed up with other stuff and in bed with people that _nobody_ , especially a nerdy kid like me, should be in bed with. Senior year, I started messing it up. We were doing alright with money, Tara was going to Hunter College and I was starting my applications. I was stressed beyond belief, regardless of how well we were doing. The one thing I was using to save me from stress started causing it and I started messing up everything. I began to confuse people’s orders and I was missing payments, people were getting mad and some moved to another dealer. I was fucked and then Tara…” Theo trailed off, his mouth dry and his eyes stinging with tears. It was so hard telling this story that it wasn’t a shock he’d only told it three times, this being the third. Theo let out a shuddered breath, _he could do this._

“Tara and her new boyfriend were on their way to our family apartment, they were coming over for dinner. We’d never met him before and she was so excited to have him over and for once she was telling me about him, we were talking like we used to. Like I said, they were on their way over when some guys came out of nowhere and held her at gunpoint, the only reason being she was _my_ sister. The boyfriend ran away like a little bitch and after they mugged Tara, they let her go, no real harm done. That was the last straw, though, if anybody fucks with my sister, they’re dead to me. I got through the year alright, broke it off with my supplier and found a new guy and I just dealt pot. After graduation, I was done with it and I promised myself I won’t do any of that shit again.” Theo concluded his story, licking his lips and swallowing around the lump in his throat. He waited patiently for Liam’s reaction, but the blue-eyed boy was just staring at him, his face void of emotions. _Is this it?_ Theo asked himself, _is this how I lose my best friend?_ The silence felt like a noose around Theo’s throat, the desperate need to know if he was too fucked up to even maintain a healthy relationship was overpowering.

“Li, please, say something,” he begged in a whisper, his voice cracking, full of emotions. Theo could practically hear the gears ticking in Liam’s brain. Theo worked hard to maintain a facade of emotional indifference, trying to mask the hope and the fear of Liam’s next words. The silence endured until Liam swallowed thickly and licked his lower lip slowly, drawing Theo’s attention towards it. Theo inhaled deeply, feeling again the sting of the tears in his eyes.  
“Theo…” Liam started, followed by a deep sigh and ending in a… chuckle. “That’s the worst you got? You did what you had to do, you did what felt right. Sure, it wasn’t the safest method of getting money or dealing with your issues. Except, you’re not _there_ now, you’re not who you were. You’re who you are _now_ , you’re _here_.”

“You’re not…” Theo let the unfinished question settle in the air, waiting with bated breath. What was he even asking? What was he even supposed to feel? Relief was the first thing that came to mind. Liam wasn’t running away screaming or speaking cryptically while secretly plotting to turn Theo in. He seemed normal now, the tension was fizzing away, in the room at least. Theo still felt like he was under intense scrutiny, despite the fact that Liam was looking at him with those soft blue eyes, the very picture of non-judgemental.

“Mad? Disappointed? Afraid?” Liam asked and Theo bit his lip, nodding. “No, I’m none of those things. Had the story been different, if I didn’t trust you, if your mom wasn’t so nice, then maybe I would be a little skeptical. That’s not the case, though, so everything is okay.”

“You promise?” Theo asked, unsure, his eyes dropping to where Liam’s hand was movements shy of holding his.

“I promise,” Liam affirmed, his hand disappearing but seconds later lifting Theo’s chin up so they made eye contact. “As long as you promise to continue to talk to me about this.”

As it wasn’t a question, but a command, Theo nodded. “I promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why do i even write this? thanks for all the kudos, and comments, and all that good shit!


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